I fall in ‘love’ quickly and devastatingly. I don’t even know what to call it, whether it is love or rather an obsession of sorts. I never fail to destroy the object of my desire in some fashion and they surely destroy me. it ends just as fast as it begins and I revisit them in my memories for years on end. I dream about them constantly, every night my heart is broken, no matter how insignificant our relationship was. I overly romanticize everything and everyone and it is exhausting.

I just really love giving people compliments and knowing I made them feel nice about themselves when they smile afterwards. 

i’d like to have a friend that doesn’t completely ignore my existence when they’re with their other friends, thanks.

I would sincerely start my entire life over from the second I was born and do every single damn thing differently, if I could. 

it absolutely kills me that you won’t open up to me. you won’t let me in and it really breaks me apart. you know close to everything about me, my fears and my insecurities, and I know next to nothing about you. if you really wanted to, you could rip my world completely to shreds. meanwhile, I wouldn’t even be able to touch you. I couldn’t hurt you, even if I wanted to. it’s not fair. I hate it. I can’t fucking stand it.

that sinking feeling when you can feel someone losing interest in you.

I just want to mean as much to someone as they mean to me.

I’m pathetic. 

it really sucks when the person that you want to talk to just seems so uninterested in talking to you.

I’m so tired of everyone making me think that I mean something to them and then leaving.

I want the security of being committed to someone, and have them committed to me as well.

I don’t know how to talk to anyone anymore. I blame you. you’ve made me this way, you’ve made me unsure of everything. now I constantly worry about everything going bad, when it’s actually fine. I overthink and assume the worst. you’re the reason I don’t believe people when they tell me they care about me, or love me. you always said those things but you never meant them. but I guess it’s also my fault for letting you do this to me, or for believing you in the first place. 

sometimes I just want to disappear for a few weeks. turn off my phone, lock myself in my room, and see who’s still there when I come back. 

always putting forth more effort than I receive. 

cayla, seventeen, taurus

anime and music are cool
video games are also cool
i don't know what i'm doing